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 My Passion

Hi, my name is Anna Alderete, and I am excited to share my first e-portfolio with you.

WHO I AM

As an experienced community college student, I have a deep passion for achieving success. My extensive experience as an international student enables me to improve my communication skills. 

It gives me great pleasure to observe how my writing skills help me not only achieve my goals but also realize my true potential.

Academic Writing ENGL 101-30446
Dr. Atkins

This English course focuses on developing critical thinking, reading, and writing skills. Students move from writing based on personal experience to producing more formal academic work. They improve their grammar, including usage, mechanics, and punctuation. Writing assignments address different audiences and purposes and use a range of rhetorical strategies. Students also write responses to assigned readings and learn the basics of standard documentation formats. By the end of the course, students must submit a final portfolio that fulfills departmental requirements.

Essay 1
This is a single story in which one aspect of my identity shaped an important or memorable experience. My conclusion explains what I realized from that experience and how it influenced my understanding of myself, whether in relation to that specific identity or to my overall sense of who I am. Because this is a narrative essay, I included the essential elements of storytelling: exposition, conflict, climax, resolution, characters, and dialogue.
 

Title:

For the Love of Rollercoasters


It was a cloudy morning in the winter season of 2006 at SeaWorld, Orlando, Florida. I 
was with my friends at the park, having a great time. Claudia, my co-worker, was my roommate. 
She told me that her dreams were coming through by being at the park. In my mind, I was 
excited about seeing the animals and attending the shows. Claudia’s friends came with us as 
well. We drove through the Everglades, I recall. On our way there, we stopped and rode a boat 
near the alligators. Claudia’s friend seemed to enjoy being afraid.
When we approached “The Mako Rollercoaster”, everyone shouted, “Let's go!” I froze. I 
told Claudia it was not a good idea. She laughed out loud and said, “You have to be kidding 
me!” I answered, “No, I am not joking.” Claudia did not seem to care about my decision, and she 
kept telling me, “Let's go.” I started to feel very uncomfortable. All I know now is that letting 
other people make decisions for you is never good. 
Claudia and I were friends at The Ritz-Carlton Hotel in Naples, Florida. She was my 
roommate, and we connected quickly. I thought she was the perfect friend. I was 2 years younger 
than her, and because she was older than I, I would always listen to her. Until the day we went to 
SeaWorld, I thought she was a good 'sister’ of mine. My biological sister is twelve years older 
than I am, so I always remember that she encouraged me to do what she says. That winter day, I 
felt colder than cold. I felt that our friendship had come to an end. She made me do something I 
was not comfortable doing. Even her friends were staring at me, laughing and making fun of me,
saying I was a “chicken.”
The line to the rollercoaster was the longest wait line of my life because I wanted to cry, 
run away, and shout. However, I couldn't because my legs started to shake. Claudia’s excitement 
Anna A

did not make any impact on me. She was holding my hand firmly and did not let me go. I was 
feeling peer-pressured, and I started to sweat. I even felt my blood pressure dropping, and my 
stomach was making noises. Being the youngest of the group did not help either. I thought to 
myself, “It is time to be a big girl now.”
When it was our turn to get in, I was the last one to sit down. When the seat belt locked 
automatically, I felt my heart rate rise, and my breathing was heavy. I could not relax and put my 
hands out as everyone else did. ‘Put your hands in the air,” Claudia exclaimed. The clicking 
noise was awful. The slow ride started to roll up, and it did not feel pleasant. I felt like I was 
going to die. Every clicking noise drove me insane. Once on the top, everybody shouted, ‘Oh 
yeah, ‘and all I remember was that I saw the small people down the 200-foot rollercoaster. 
I could not believe how horrible I felt after the 54-second ride fell. The worst 54 seconds 
of my life. I was vomiting and feeling so sick that Claudia was holding my hair and saying, “It is 
okay.” I felt that I was locked out, and when I was finally released, I let my guard down, crying 
and asking to see my mother. “Mommy, mommy,” I cried.
Being in this peer-pressure experience has taught me not to do things that I do not want to 
do at all. I learned how to say no. I became resilient in setting boundaries. Now I am forty years 
old. I still struggle to set boundaries, especially as a mother. Claudia and I never talked about 
today, nor did she apologize for “making” me ride the roller coasters. I wish someone would 
teach me to set boundaries. When I told my sister, she said, “See? You live and learn.

Essay 2
I chose compare-contrast; I was only able to use two sources. Information I add in your paper verifiable through the work, not other sources you found 

Title: The Cost of Survival

Some people say survival is essential to live and tell. Some other people say that survival 
is traumatizing. Everyone has a story to share, but not everyone wants to remember how they 
survived a crisis. For example, someone decides to migrate to a different country. Then, this 
person finds out that the culture in the new place is completely different. Most people experience 
cultural shock, homesickness, and loneliness. The short film Silent Beats, written by Jon M Chu 
(1), explores themes of stereotyping, first impressions, and perceptions. This short film contrasts 
the Asian men, the elderly white women, and the young African Americans’ behavior in only 
five minutes, which made it very interesting.

The Asian man never suspected the old white lady would have stolen from him, but he 
did suspect the black gentleman was going to rob him at gunpoint. Based on race, the Asian man 
never smiled at the young gentleman he was shopping alone at the convenience store. The old 
woman was also not smiling at the young gentleman and did not even thank him for picking up 
something she dropped on the floor. The young gentleman was also judging the Asian clerk as 
“an immigrant who likes to take pictures”. In addition, the young African American was 
stereotyping the old lady as “she is old, plays cards, and will die soon.”

Another contrast the author highlighted in the film was the age of the lady and the 
gentleman. The clerk assumed that he was going to be in trouble as soon as he saw the African 
American is getting into the store. As soon as the Asian man saw him coming into the store, he

looked nervous, anxious, and prepared to call the police. Usually, people judge that young people 
are naive and rebellious. This is an example of stereotyping that the author showed in his work.

Living in a society where there is such immense diversity makes the community look 
vulnerable, susceptible, and treated unfairly. Most immigrants came to the USA to find a better 
future, and it is unfortunate to find out about segregation, discrimination, and hate against race, 
age, and ethnicity. The short film was made in 2001, which means disparities have changed over 
the years. More immigrants came to the country and found out that they were experiencing 
culture shock, feeling alone, and being discriminated against based on their appearance. The 
short film reveals these themes with concrete examples at a convenience store.

Essay 3
I wrote a 3- to 5-page argumentative essay that clearly identifies your position on that problem for my readers. I identified a problem that affects a community and explained why the issue is crucial to the reader.

Titulo:

Multilingualism: A Strength, not a Weakness

Speaking more than one language should be considered a strength, yet many multilingual students 
They are treated as though it is a weakness. In schools and communities across the country, multilingual 
Students often face language barriers, stereotypes, and limited academic support. Some students 
struggle to participate in class discussions or feel pressured to hide their native language to fit in 
with others. These challenges can affect their confidence, education, and sense of belonging within 
the community. However, multilingualism provides important cultural and communication skills 
that benefit both schools and society as a whole. Although multilingual students contribute 
important cultural and linguistic strengths to society, they often face discrimination and limited 
support in schools, making better educational resources necessary.

One major problem multilingual student face is the lack of support in schools. Many students who 
speak another language at home struggle to fully understand lessons, assignments, or classroom 
discussions because schools often do not provide enough language resources or assistance. As a 
result, these students may fall behind academically even when they are intelligent and hardworking. 
In some cases, multilingual students also experience embarrassment or anxiety when speaking in 
class because they fear being judged for their accents or grammar mistakes. This can lower their 
confidence and make them feel isolated from their classmates. Without proper support, students 
may begin to believe that their native language is a disadvantage instead of an important part of

their identity. Schools should recognize that multilingual students bring valuable perspectives and 
skills to the classroom and deserve equal opportunities to succeed academically and socially.

Multilingualism also benefits schools and communities in many important ways. People 
who speak more than one language are often able to communicate with different groups of people 
and help create stronger connections between cultures. In the article “Skills of Cognitive 
Flexibility in Monolingual and Bilingual Younger Adults,” the article reads about how these 
results suggest that bilingualism improves cognitive flexibility, though it does not significantly 
affect sustained attention, and that regularly managing and switching between languages plays a 
key role in cognitive development. Learning and speaking multiple languages can improve 
problem-solving skills, memory, and communication abilities. Despite these advantages, 
multilingual students are sometimes treated unfairly or pressured to stop using their native 
language in order to fit in. This not only harms students emotionally, but it can also cause 
communities to lose valuable cultural traditions and perspectives. Instead of discouraging 
multilingualism, schools and communities should celebrate language diversity and encourage 
students to take pride in their cultural identities. In diverse communities, multilingual individuals 
can assist families, translate information, and improve understanding between people from 
different backgrounds.

Studies show that speaking multiple languages can improve communication skills, memory, 
and critical thinking abilities. Schools and communities can take several steps to better support 
multilingual students and create more inclusive environments. One important solution is providing 
stronger language assistance programs, such as bilingual tutors, translation services, and English 
language learning resources. Teachers can also encourage students to participate in class without 
fear of being judged for their accents or language differences. In addition, schools should celebrate

cultural diversity through events, clubs, and activities that allow students to share their languages 
and traditions with others. These efforts can help multilingual students feel respected, confident, 
and included in their communities. In the article “Ed. Dept. Moves to Shutter Its Office for English 
Learners”, by Ileana Najarro, talks about the shuttering of the office of English acquisition, also 
known as OLEA. The Department of Education notified key members of Congress that it intended 
to eliminate the office and transfer OELA’s programs and responsibilities to other departments, 
removing the need for OELA to operate as an independent office. In addition, the article reads 
about how experts in English learner education and advocacy groups are concerned that 
eliminating OELA could reduce the quality of guidance, support, and resources provided to states 
and schools that serve English learners. When schools support language diversity, all students 
benefit by learning to appreciate different cultures and perspectives. Creating inclusive 
environments not only improves education for multilingual students but also strengthens the 
community as a whole.

In conclusion, multilingual students face many challenges in schools and communities, 
including language barriers, discrimination, and limited academic support. Despite these 
difficulties, multilingualism provides important benefits such as stronger communication skills, 
cultural diversity, and greater understanding between people from different backgrounds. Schools 
and communities should recognize that speaking multiple languages is a strength rather than a 
weakness. By providing better educational resources and creating more inclusive environments, 
schools can help multilingual students feel supported and successful. When communities value 
and encourage multilingualism, everyone benefits from a more connected, respectful, and diverse 
society.

 

Essay 4

Reflective Essay

The areas I struggled with most were organization and sentence clarity. In several of my 
early essays, my ideas were not always arranged logically, which made some paragraphs feel 
disconnected from my thesis. I also struggled with writing concise academic sentences because I 
sometimes included unnecessary repetition or unclear wording. Another challenge was balancing 
analysis with summary, especially in essays that required critical thinking and interpretation of 
sources. Another area I still need to improve is developing deeper analytical responses to 
readings and outside sources. At times, I relied too heavily on summary instead of fully 
explaining how the ideas connected to my own argument. Future writing courses will require 
stronger critical analysis and more independent interpretation of sources. Although I made 
progress in developing stronger thesis-driven essays and incorporating feedback during revision, 
I still struggle with organization, sentence clarity, and deeper analytical writing. My earlier 
essays often contained disconnected ideas, repetitive wording, and excessive summary, which 
showed me the importance of logical structure and critical analysis in college-level writing.

One area where I experienced the most difficulty this semester was organization and 
sentence clarity in my essays. In several of my earlier assignments, my body paragraphs did not 
always connect clearly to my thesis, which caused some ideas to appear disorganized or 
underdeveloped. I often struggled to arrange my points logically, making it difficult for my 
essays to flow smoothly from one paragraph to the next. In addition, I found it challenging to 
write concise academic sentences because I sometimes repeated ideas or used unclear wording 
that weakened my analysis. Another major challenge involved balancing summary with critical 
analysis when responding to readings and outside sources. Instead of fully explaining how the 
evidence supported my argument, I occasionally relied too heavily on summarizing the material.

However, through revision and instructor feedback, I began to recognize the importance of 
organization, sentence clarity, and deeper analytical thinking in college-level writing. Although I 
made progress in developing stronger thesis-driven essays and revising my work more 
effectively, I understand that I still need to continue improving these skills for future writing 
courses.

One of the areas where I made the most dramatic progress was developing stronger 
thesis-driven essays and learning how to incorporate feedback during the revision process. At the 
beginning of the semester, my thesis statements were often too broad and did not clearly guide 
the direction of my essays. As a result, some of my body paragraphs lacked focus and connection 
to my main argument. However, after receiving feedback from my instructor and peers, I learned 
how to create more specific and analytical thesis statements that improved the overall 
organization of my writing. Revising my essays also helped me recognize the importance of 
rewriting and reevaluating my ideas instead of submitting a first draft without changes. Through 
multiple drafts, peer reviews, and instructor comments, I became more aware of my weaknesses 
and learned how to strengthen my arguments with clearer explanations and stronger supporting 
evidence. This progress helped me become a more thoughtful and organized writer, and it 
showed me that effective writing is a process that requires patience, revision, and critical 
reflection.

Another area where I showed growth this semester was my ability to integrate evidence 
and respond more effectively to readings and outside sources. In earlier essays, I often included 
quotations or paraphrased information without fully explaining how the evidence supported my 
argument. This made some of my analysis feel incomplete or overly focused on summary rather 
than interpretation. However, as the semester progressed, I became more intentional about

connecting evidence to my thesis and explaining its significance within my paragraphs. 
Feedback from my instructor helped me understand that simply including sources is not enough; 
I needed to analyze and interpret them in order to strengthen my argument. I also improved in 
selecting more relevant evidence and placing it more effectively within my essays to support my 
main ideas. Although I still need to continue developing deeper critical analysis skills, I have 
made clear progress in learning how to engage with sources in a more thoughtful and academic 
way.

In conclusion, my writing throughout this semester reflects meaningful growth in several 
key areas, particularly in developing stronger thesis statements, incorporating feedback during 
revision, and improving my use of evidence. Through multiple drafts and instructor guidance, I 
learned that effective writing is a recursive process that requires planning, revising, and critical 
reflection rather than relying on a single draft. At the same time, my portfolio also highlights 
ongoing challenges with organization, sentence clarity, and deeper analytical thinking, which I 
will continue to address in future writing courses. As I move forward into courses such as ENGL 
102 and other college-level classes that require writing, I will apply the skills I have developed in 
revision, source integration, and thesis development while also focusing on strengthening my 
ability to write with greater clarity and depth. Overall, this course has helped me understand that 
strong academic writing is built through continuous improvement and careful attention to both 
strengths and areas for growth.

Essay 1

I have to choose one of the three writing options: exemplification, narrative, or descriptive. I chose the narrative option and told a story using the elements of narration which are: exposition, conflict, climax, resolution, characters,and dialog.

For this essay, I used freewriting to start organizing my ideas. I learned that there are many other ways to start a draft.

Essay 2

I chose to write a comparison and contrast essay in which I evaluate the points of similarity and difference between the assigned work’s usage of a concept and my selected work. I chose a Silent Beats by Jon M Chu short film to compare and contrast inequalities within society.

For this essay, I worked with a tutor because I didn't know which subject to choose from Jon M. Chu's short video, as there were many topics to talk about. Luckily, my tutor was very helpful.

Essay 3

For this essay, I had to choose one of three topics: issues in art, the self and the global issue, or community reads. I chose community reads, and I enjoyed writing about multilingualism. I also needed a tutor who helped me to write this specific type of essay since I also had to learn how to use MLA and cite in-text.

I spent more time researching this topic because I needed data to support my statements. As I was investigating, I found it very interesting to use the book "Rules for writers" because it explained in details how to use MLA and also it explains with examples many of the common mistakes we practice in class; run-ons and fracgments, and punctuation.

Essay 4

Self-reflections and self-reviews.

I think this was the most difficult essay to write because I have many areas of my writing to work on. Using tutors from the tutoring centers was very helpful. I am glad I learned in this class what it takes to write academic essays at a college level.

MONTGOMERY COLLEGE

Materials Used by Dr. Atkins

These are examples of reading and peer review

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